Friday, June 10, 2011

Moving On

I'm done with this blog.

Not blogging itself, mind you. Just this particular blog.

This chapter of my life is done.

I'm starting a new part of my life, and I think it calls for a new blog. A fresh start, if you will.

Things will be changing for me quite a bit.

Hello world.

Thursday, May 19, 2011

Caustic and Candid

So I've decided to tell you, lovely readers, what caustic and candid actually mean and why I chose that as my blog name.


caus·tic/ˈkôstik/ 

Adjective
1. Scathingly sarcastic.


can·did/ˈkandid/Adjective

1. Truthful and straightforward; frank.

I chose these two adjectives for my blog for a few reasons. First off, I am sarcastic, and at times rude about it. I can come off as quite abrasive. Basically, caustic is a fair warning for readers. Sometimes I'm gonna sound like an absolute bitch. Secondly, I tell it like I see it. That's pretty much why my friend Sarah's mom hates me. I don't like to beat around the bush. So my blogs may not always be terribly long, because I like to get to the point of why I'm writing that particular day. 

Aaaaaand that's about the end of this particular blog post. So here's a picture I made of an Ood. 


Monday, May 16, 2011

Bibliophile

It's been awhile since I've blogged. I simply can't think of what to write about.

There are many things going on in my life, hard things, and when things get difficult or unpleasant or downright awful, I retreat into myself. I stay in my head a lot and don't let anyone in. It's a terrible habit, but I just can't seem to change it. Oh well.


bib·li·o·phile/ˈbiblēəˌfīl/

Noun: A person who collects or has a great love of books

I consider myself to be a bit of a bibliophile. I love books. I love horrors, thrillers, mysteries, fantasy, sci-fi, anything with a good plot line really. 

Some friends can't understand why I love books. 

Books are amazing. I love getting lost in fantasy worlds. When reality is boring, books can provide you with hours of adventures in far away lands or with fantastical characters. They're even better than movies, because you can make the characters speak in any way, or you can even imagine they look however you want, not just how they are described. You can imagine yourself as one of the characters. With a good imagination, anything is possible in the realm of stories. 

Take me away to my fantasy world, give me another book, let's have another whorl. Take me to a waking dream of whimsical wonder, its my addiction, give me another. 

If the stories in books just aren't cutting it for you, you can even write your own. Make up your own land, your own characters, your own fantasy. 

There are millions of books with millions of stories and millions of different realms. Where's yours?  

Tuesday, April 12, 2011

The roommate (dun, dun DUUUUUUNNNN!!!)

My posts have been such downers lately! I think its about time for some humor. So I'm going to tell you about my roommate.

Roomie and I first met on the first day here at Simpson. I didn't know what to expect, she could have been a crazy ax murderer for all I knew.

Hey, she could've been!

Anyways...

So first day, you know how it is. A little weird. I mean, you're going to be living with this person for the next 9 months and you're complete strangers. Awwwwkkkwwaaarrrdddd.
We were super conscientious of the other's feelings. We made sure our sleeping music wasn't too loud for the other, weren't too loud or imposing. You know the drill.

Fast forward a few months. We got another roommate and they were close, I kind of just did my own thing and didn't talk to them much.

Fast forward a few more months. Other roomie ended up leaving and roomie and I bonded over mutual issues.
We hung out more, got to know each other better, and now we enjoy bugging the crap out of the other and pranking each other!

I'll tell you about a few pranks and just funny things that prove we've lived together for too long.

Roomie has a hot sauce obsession. She puts it on everything, and I mean EVERYTHING. She even puts it on hot cheetos. One day she came over to my bed and asked me "Do you know what the saddest day of my life was?"
I said: "When you ran out of Sriracha?"
Roomie: "YES! How did you know?!"

That's how I know.
Also, Chrunches are the knock off kind...ahem

One of our roommate hobbies is going to WalMart at 2 in the morning. Why? Because we don't sleep and we need things at 2 in the morning.
We have learned that there are very creepy people there at 2 AM.
We still go anyways.

Once, I pranked her by putting saran wrap on the toilet seat. She totally fell for it. It retaliation, she put random crap all over me and my bed at 3 in the morning and I woke up wet because she tried to put my hand in water to make me pee myself. It didn't work.

She also likes to trick me into watching Rocky Horror Picture Show.

Roomie also introduced me to the pace where I got my first tattoo, which she was there for.

We do a lot of random things together, yell at each other across campus, and make fun of each other. Roomie is a crazy ass and I'm gonna miss her next year.

But for now, I gotta find another prank to pull on her before she gets back to the room...
>:D

Thursday, April 7, 2011

Memories

Some memories are a bitch. We all know that. 

And the funny thing is, for the most part, we forget a majority of the good memories and only recall the bad ones. 

Stupid things we've said. People that have hurt us. Painful lessons we have learned. Finding out for the first time that the world is not as carefree and happy as we once assumed. 

Memories are something that I have been struggling with recently. I can't remember a good portion of the first 10 years of my life because my subconscious has blocked it out. Sometimes, I wish I could block out more. Other times, I wish I could remember what went on during that period of time.

Do you ever wish you could edit your memory? Cut out the worst times of your life? 

Would it make you happier? Or just more confused about yourself?

Great questions. 

We can't fully rid ourselves of bad memories. We can bury them, but for how long?

And when they're buried, how long until we wish we knew what was trapped away behind the iron bars of our deepest consciousness? 

My guess is not long. 

Experiences shape who we are, how we think, what we do. I've come to the conclusion that we just have to come to terms with our memories, with our experiences, good and bad. Accept them. Get closure.

But closure is always the most difficult when there are unknowns. 

Tuesday, March 15, 2011

Dangerous relationships

Today's blog is about something that has been plaguing my mind lately. Abuse in a relationship comes in many different forms, its not purely physical. It can also be emotional.

Recently, I've been hearing about this girl and her boyfriend. She is completely and utterly obsessed with him. She talks about nothing else. I also learned that her boyfriend is completely horrible to her. He calls her names like whore, bitch, fat cow, etc.

I was completely appalled when I heard that. That is not how a boyfriend should treat his girlfriend. That's not how anyone should treat ANYONE, ever.

And yet, she stays with him. Actually, they broke up and she begged for him back.

Uhh...what?? I would think she'd be glad to be out of that.

But, she seems like the type of girl who would succumb to battered women's syndrome. Which is really sad.

Towards the beginning of the school year, there was a presentation about domestic abuse. We heard a woman's story of a horrid relationship she was in, and talked to us about how your significant other should treat you like a princess/prince. I wonder if this girl went to this presentation.

It's not just boys treating girls terribly, girls treat boys horribly as well. Girls think they can get away with it more because they are considered the "weaker sex". But that's not true-girl's words can be just as destructive as a boy's. Sometimes, even more so, because girls know better how to use their words to decimate someone.

Everyone deserves to be treated like they are the greatest person ever.
Unless they're someone like...Hitler.
Wait...maybe if Hitler was in a fantastic, supportive, loving relationship, he would have been a better, nicer person.
-failed attempt at adding humor to this post-

I know a lot of you are saying "if I were ever in that situation, I'd be gone SO fast..."
I've personally said the same thing.
But sometimes I think...what if I were in her shoes? If I loved the person? Would I just stick it out and hope it got better?
I honestly don't know.
I'm just lucky that I have a man who calls me princess.

Well, that's all I have to say for this post.
Humor next time.

Tuesday, March 1, 2011

My top 10 reasons why Twilight vampires are not real vampires

First things first. I used to like Twilight, when I was a sophomore in high school. I've read all the books and seen all the movies. Twilight vampires and real vampires are very, very different (focusing more on the Cullens than the rest of the vampy population).
This is my list of why Twilight vamps suck.
In my humble opinion, of course.

1. They have reflections in a mirror.
What the hell is this? Real vampires don't have a reflection when looking in a mirror. Why? Because real vampires have no souls. Mirrors are a symbol of self reflection, of looking into oneself, into one's soul. But if there is no soul, then there is nothing to look at. No self to reflect from a mirror.
My conclusion: Twilight vamps must have souls. And thus are not real vampires.

2. They try to be good people by being "vegetarians".
'Vegetarians', as in only feeding from animals.
No. No no no! Real vampires don't give a shit about being people-friendly. They drink who they want when they want. Period.

3. They pledge not to harm humans.
Hand over your vamp card. Now. The whole point of vampires is to be bad asses who massacre. MASSACRE. As in mangled bodies and blood and brutality. Not being weenies who want to "fit it" with everyone else. This just makes me think they are all really 13 year old girls.

4. They sparkle.
The only people I know who sparkle are Lady Gaga and drag queens (arguably one in the same). Vampires do not sparkle as if they have been attacked by an angry mob of kindergarteners who were just having arts and crafts time in the sun. Real vampires burn in the sun. Why? BECAUSE THEY ARE EVIL SOULLESS BEINGS.
Edit: Dillon corrected me; "I have an addition. It's Lady Gaga, drag queens, and David Bowie who sparkle. And even then, David Bowie is the only man allowed to sparkle."


5. They don't have fangs.
No. Fangs. How are these things even called vampires?! Twilight "vamps" don't have fangs, they have razor sharp teeth coated in venom. WTF. The venom, if left to spread, changes the victim into a vampire. Which only happens if it is an older, experienced vamp doing the biting, because once they start feeding its nearly impossible to stop.
Well, at least they have one vamp-like attribute. Kind of.

6. Their favorite sport is baseball.
What kind of blood sucking creature freaking plays baseball?! Real vamps are too busy DRINKING HUMAN BLOOD to play baseball. I don't know why, but the fact that they frolic through fields playing baseball really bugs me.

7. They go to high school/have jobs.
If you had forever to life, would you waste your immortality going back to HIGH SCHOOL? I know I wouldn't. I'd be too busy fucking shit up. Because I'd be a BAMF.

8. They are nearly indestructible.
The only way to kill a Twilight vamp is to rip them apart and burn the pieces. Which isn't an easy feat, since their skin is like marble. Only werewolves and other vampires have the strength to rip them apart like that.
What happened to the good ol' stake to the heart?

9. They don't sleep. Ever.
Real vampires sleep during the day in coffins. They don't stay up all night playing the piano or painting their nails.

10. Nothing deters them. 
Garlic, Holy water, crosses, hawthorn, and mountain ash will do nothing to Twilight vamps. Nothing wards them off.
But I wouldn't be too worried. The worst thing that would happen to you is Alice takes you on a 12 hour shopping spree.

Saturday, February 26, 2011

People that deserve a hoard of slobbering, fire breathing, demon monkeys

As promised, this post will be about the people and things that should be eradicated by demon monkeys! Oh, happy day!

-Ahem- Aaaaaand here we go!

Over Zealous Glee Fans
You love Glee. You think its the bee's knees and the cat's meow. I get it. But when your every other Facebook post is about how Glee is the best thing of your life and you love the characters and anyone who doesn't watch it is stupid and blah blah blah, I want to slap you in the face with a dead fish.

Fan Girls
Fan girls come in many shapes, sizes, and obsessions. They are generally 13-15, have high pitched banshee voices, and will berate you for 12 hours if you say one negative thing about whatever they're obsessed with. Beware of these irritating little monsters and if you hear "OH EM GEEEEEEEE!!!!!!" in an octave only slightly lower than what only your dog can hear, RUN.

Twilight Moms
I shouldn't even have to elaborate on this, but I will. You, dear reader, have probably seen this either online, or if you're incredibly unlucky, in person. A "Twi-Mom" is a woman in her mid 40's, married with children, in love with a fictional 17 year old vampire (Edward), and this vampire happens to be targeted at a 14 year old demographic. This is so wrong on so many different levels. Twi-mom's probably have kids as old as their fictional love interest, first of all. Second, Edward has the emotional maturity of a blueberry scone. Third, and most importantly, HE IS NOT REAL. Please get a reality check and move on.



Delusional Fan Girls
This is a whole other category from normal fan girls. These fan girls have delusions of the object of their interest loving them back. They are anywhere from 12-20. They will frequently say things such as "back off of my husband!!!", "don't even think about my man!!!!!", "when I meet him, he'll fall in love with me too and we'll run off together!!!", or "that bitch he's dating needs to step off!!!!".
These girls make me want to *facepalm*.
He will never love you. He will never know you exist. He is so completely unobtainable. You are better off dating a walrus.

People Who Argue With Significant Others On The Dorm Walkway
You are loud. My window is open. I hear EVERYTHING YOU SAY, and I really don't care. Please go away. I'm not trying to eavesdrop, but you sound like a troop of howler monkeys getting attacked by hyenas while listening to death metal.
Yes, I do like monkeys.
Moving on.

People Who Shove Their Beliefs on You
You're a vegetarian? Fantastic! I'm a carnivore, and I'm perfectly happy with that. Yes, I eat things with a face. Leave me alone. 


Oh, there are plenty more things that annoy the hell out of me, but I figure this post is long enough.
Until next time.

Friday, February 18, 2011

Sleeping is such a waste of time

So today I was asked, "Why don't you ever sleep?"

Well, for one, I'm an insomniac. I have sleeping pills, but I hate taking them because they make me groggy. Secondly, sleeping is such a waste of time! Humans could get so much more done if they never had to sleep!

Just imagine it...an extra 8ish hours every day to get stuff done. Homework, inventions, reading; the possibilities are endless. This would only work, however, if humans didn't get tired. Or procrastinate so much.

I don't know about you, lovely readers, but my best ideas come at night. That's when I get inspired to blog, or write anything really. I get these ideas and concepts and just so much rushes into my head in the dead of night to do. But, I try to get sleep so I'm not zombie status the next day in classes. So oftentimes, my ideas and projects I want to start get postponed or forgotten.

This is such a drag to me. I realllllly want to do something, but I tell myself, no Becca, you need to sleep or angry dinosaur monsters from the 7th dimension of hell will come and eat your toes if you don't sleep.

Or something like that.

Anyways...

It's getting to be that time again where I need to choose between taking a sleepy time pill or laying in the dark for 4 hours not sleeping.

On the upside, I think my next post will be a randomly compiled list of things that make me want to unleash a hoard of slobbering, fire breathing, demon monkies on people! Hooray!



PS: I know you're totally jealous of my artistic skills. Its okay. Not everyone can be this good.

:)

Thursday, February 10, 2011

OmG i LyKe ToTaLlY lUv HiM!!!1!11!1!!!1!

You can probably guess what this post is going to be about based on the title.

Now, I don't have many pet peeves, but this one really irks me. I cannot stand it when girls say things like "I love him sooooo much!!!" after being with a guy for 2 weeks. That is not love, dear children. That is a crush.

I have one friend who constantly posts on Facebook about how she loves this guy so much and is going to marry him. Then, a week or two later, she's posting about how this guy has broken her heart, it'll never be mended, blah blah blah. And then the cycle begins again.



One month, she was saying how she was going to be an army wife. Then her heart was irreparably broken. Then she met a new guy the next month, and suddenly she was thinking of a summer wedding. I mean, really? And that is ALL she posts about these days. So irritating.

Not only is it irritating, but it also gives the rest of us females a bad name. I'm engaged to be married, and I'm serious about it. But because of females such as her, no one takes me seriously and thinks it will be short lived. Which makes me sad, but also determined to show them that we aren't all shallow brainless twits.

So that was my rant of the day. What are your pet peeves?

Tuesday, February 8, 2011

Good day, insomniacs

Hello there. I see you have somehow stumbled upon my modest blog, most likely by mistake. Hey, come on in, make yourself comfortable, I don't bite. Or do I? I suppose you wouldn't know, dear reader, for I am new to you. 


Here you will find my commentary to the life that goes on around me. You'll read my opinions on matters that you probably don't care about. I'm blunt, opinionated, sarcastic, and on occasion, funny. 


Allow me to introduce myself. I am an observer. I see the things and hear the things that you don't think twice about telling me. I'm the one you come to for advice because you trust I'll never tell. I'm content-oriented. I know you better than you think. I'm the one you don't pay much attention to, because on the surface I am frivolous, in this place at least. 


Here, I wear a mask, and it never slips. I play my part and you never know the difference. Here I am who I need to be. One day, in some place, the facade will fall away. 


But for now, I am Rebecca.  


It's a pleasure to meet you.